


if a body catch a body

by londonromance



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Road Trips, inspired by verse 2, like basically end of high school summer before college, like i've shown restraint this time lol, mentions of the other members, nevermind just kidding lol apparently everyone's gonna appear when they want, slight angst, somewhere in that zone
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-17
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2018-12-16 09:49:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11826216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/londonromance/pseuds/londonromance
Summary: comin' through the rye."Jaebum is the confident sort of careless that rounds out Jinyoung’s careful and sharp edges. It made them great friends, the best of the best.But it always seemed like they were waiting. For each other, for some kind of divine intervention, no one ever really said, but Jaebum and Jinyoung tended to brush it off until they didn’t."





	1. hope locked up my throat

When Jinyoung finally gets out of class, Jaebum is leaning against a sunburnt pick-up truck Jinyoung has never seen before in his life.

Jaebum says nothing and walks around to the other side of the car, leaving the passenger door open and waiting. “Get in,” he says. He opens his door, but looks back when he sees Jinyoung standing stock still.

“If you’re going to steal a car, you should aim your sights higher than Old MacDonald.” Jinyoung says nonchalantly, hiking his backpack further up his shoulder. “It’s not stealing if they’re thankful you took it off their hands.”

Jinyoung crinkles his nose and his eyes shine. Jaebum knows it would be a full-blown snort if it was anybody less composed and poised than Jinyoung.

“I prefer the term ‘long-term borrowing’.”  Jaebum shrugs. “Still implies that I have poor taste, which –“

“Explains why I’m friends with you,” Jinyoung finishes with a smirk.

Jaebum answers with one of his own. He’d be less inclined if he didn’t see it coming.

“Anyway, you’re wrong. This is or was Mark’s cousin’s car and he sold it to me, so I’d be only stealing and/or borrowing from myself.”

“Yeah, because paying any amount of money for this rust bucket isn’t a crime in and of itself.” Jinyoung says, eyeing the scraped paint. Other than its’ shabby and unassuming appearance, the interior looks worn but well-kept and he’s really just being picky at this point, he knows. A car is a car, especially to people who don’t have one and don’t want to spend all day in their school parking lot on their last day of high school.

 _I.e. me_ , Jinyoung thinks.

He gives a long-suffering and dramatic sigh. “Fine, Fast and the Furious. I’m here to be impressed." 

Jaebum gets in as Jinyoung drapes himself over the passenger seat. “Woo me, Im Jaebum,” Jinyoung swoons.

Jaebum swipes under Jinyoung’s chin with a cheesy wink. “Too late.”

Jinyoung falls over dramatically onto Jaebum’s shoulder, clutching his heart. “Jaebum-ah! Take account of my frail faculties! My heart can’t take you.”

Jaebum lets Jinyoung play out with a fond smile and eventually Jinyoung removes himself from his shoulder so Jaebum can start the car.

It starts with a rumble, but Jaebum pulls out of the school parking lot with a lot more ease than Jinyoung had anticipated.

 “So what’s with you stealing my M.O., kid? Skipping out on first period and leaving me hanging,” Jaebum says.

Jinyoung laughs and rolls his window down while they’re at a red light. The breeze flies through his hair and he’s iridescent. “What, there’s only room for one rebel in this town? You’re not even wearing leather this time.”

“That’s because you still have my jacket in your closet, brat,” Jaebum tugs on Jinyoung’s oversized sweater. “You’re straight fluff, Jinyoungie. What’s up with the spontaneity? Don’t tell me we’re not going home for milk and cookies and cartoons, and you want to go sneak into an R-rated movie.”

Jinyoung swats Jaebum’s hand away with a scoff. “I’m not crazy.” Jinyoung says, unearthing a package of Oreos from his bag. “Or breaking tradition.”

“Didn’t you just come from the dentist?” Jaebum says.

Jinyoung smiles with his eyes, a charming and heart-stopping sight when it wasn’t used to get what he wanted (and even then…). “I always floss. Dr. Kim thinks it’s one of the cornerstones of my stunning personality.”

The light turns green and Jaebum faces front.  “Park Jinyoung: the only senior who would skip the last day of high school lawfully and with a real excuse.”

Jinyoung shrugs and they sit in silence. “I just got to thinking, though.”

Jaebum lies in wait.

“College, yeah?” Jinyoung says, leaning on the console between them, resting his chin in his hand. “Like past us literally playing out an after school special right now, we’re basically there.”

“Yeah,” Jaebum says simply. He glances at Jinyoung, who looks thoughtful or perturbed or both.

“It’s literally right there. The whole thing, our whole lives or whatever.”

Jaebum doesn’t know what to say. They’ve been disillusioned for some time, in general and about going off into the real world, Jinyoung due to his older sisters and Jaebum due to his personality.

They’ve long known the plan. Jinyoung is going to pursue something smart, something guaranteed to put his fast-track brains and mouth to better use than what’s offered in their town. Jaebum’s always been more tactile but nevertheless brilliant. He has a lot more avenues he wants to go down, wants to try all the thousands of things on his mind before he commits.

But even so, they’re dead set on living together to save money and exasperation at having to learn about someone else’s quirks and odd edges. They joke that they’ve stuck together out of convenience and mutual hatred of the idea of starting over with new people.

Yet somehow that’s exactly what happened when they befriended the new kids in town, all transplants from other, bigger places who drifted in for one reason or another. They’ve taken in some other boys too, young, local, and as shy as Jinyoung and Jaebum had been probably once in their lives until they just turned out so damn shameless.

“We should do something. Something big, something kind of stupid,” Jinyoung grins and he catches Jaebum’s eye with this one. “I know you’ve already got that covered, but let’s just play pretend.”

Jaebum rolls his eyes. “Fine, we don’t have to watch Simpsons. We’ll watch that foreign film with the damn subtitles you’ve been talking about.”

Jinyoung swats Jaebum’s arm. “First of all, I accept your terms. Second, that’s not what I meant at all.”

Jaebum reaches the crossroad in their neighborhood. Turn left and his house is at the end of the cul-de-sac. Jinyoung lives on the right, so Jaebum makes the turn.

Even before he had his own car, Jaebum always made the obligatory stop here at the end of the road a second longer than needed. Jinyoung always reads into it, thinking out loud that Jaebum has too many choices and not enough lives to sort them all out.

“How big and stupid are we talking?” Jaebum asks, already regretful. He can never resist the urge to indulge in Jinyoung’s whims, which Jinyoung takes full advantage of often.

“Well, from polling the biggest and stupidest people we know,” Jinyoung says, scrolling through his texts. “Bambam says skinny dipping because we’re too tame for anything more extreme. Yugyeom says to _not_ go for a horror movie like we always do the next time we go on a date.”

Jinyoung says this without comment, although they’re both extraordinarily well-aware that their friends are waiting for them to be something other than…whatever they are now. Jaebum is the confident sort of careless that rounds out Jinyoung’s careful and sharp edges. It made them great friends, the best of the best.  But it also was a subject of great contest among their other friends. It always seemed like they were waiting, they always say. For each other, for some kind of divine intervention, no one ever really said, but Jaebum and Jinyoung tended to brush it off until they didn’t.

“Didn’t” hadn’t ever really come up just yet.

“Jackson is saying I’m having a quarter-life crisis because I’m so boring all the time, and Mark hasn’t replied yet because he’s probably beating up Jackson for being rude in the chat,” Jinyoung says. “Is Youngjae still at practice?”

“Yeah, he’ll be a couple hours more. Vocal coach is really stretching him thin for the recital. Not like he needs it, but he’s stressing out over it anyway. Took him out for ice cream last night just to see him smile again.”

Jinyoung absentmindedly runs his hand along Jaebum’s arm, eyes still on his phone. “Brother of the year, you are.”

Jaebum lets Jinyoung continue until they pull into Jinyoung’s driveway. They both get out and talk of doing something grand before they start the rest of their lives is tabled in favor of two episodes of The Simpsons and half of the French film Jinyoung had been looking forward to, coupled with all the Oreos and milk they could handle until they pass out on top of each other on the couch.

Before he drifts off completely, Jaebum looks at Jinyoung’s soft and feathered out lines and how he’s got his arm tucked under his head, without worries or cares.

Jaebum smiles to himself and throws a blanket over them both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't even know guys??? jj project just hits me so hard and this is heavily inspired by the verse 2/tomorrow, today aesthetic. i've literally never attempted a multichap anything in my life so we'll see how this goes what with real life or whatever!!
> 
> fic title from the catcher in the rye  
> chapter title from jj project's "coming home"


	2. day by day

The next few days go just as Jaebum expects. He’s picking more shifts up at the coffee shop he works at part-time, so that he can save up for new movies to accidentally sleep through with Jinyoung and pour all of his spare cash into the bottomless pit he now knows to be his car.

There wasn’t anything wrong with it, but Jaebum held a certain type of affection for weathered but well-kept things. It showed in his beaten up but mostly broken in leather jacket that he refused to replace (especially since it spent more of its time on Jinyoung than on Jaebum) and the wooden bookcase he had built with his grandfather. It could use some varnish and maybe a little dusting, but it was all in its character.

Jaebum remembers when Jinyoung had asked to organize it one rainy afternoon while Jaebum made them something to eat. He had waved him off, but by the time he came back to his room with the two sandwiches he had made, Jinyoung had basically transformed the whole thing.

His books were organized by favoritism, creased spines and dog-eared corners all littering the top shelf. His CDs were scattered throughout in horizontal stacks and Jinyoung had taken some of his figurines and collectibles and stacked them on these.

Jinyoung had taken his sandwich and laid on Jaebum’s bed without saying a word and Jaebum let it go as Jiyoung pressed play on his laptop and the movie they were watching started again.

But sometimes when Jaebum faced that corner of the room, sleep slowly settling in, he could feel a smile coming on as he drowsily tried to focus on the orange spine of _The Catcher in the Rye_ , the first book on the first shelf. It was actually Jinyoung’s copy, filled with scribbles and highlights and love for the literature within.

Jaebum always had some kind of book in his hands to pass the time, in between long car rides and even longer flights. Sometimes Jinyoung would be curious and ask what he was reading, and whatever Jaebum’s answer was tended to be what he saw in Jinyoung’s hands the next day.

But one day, Jinyoung went on a bender and decided to read through a list of the greatest books of all time. He inhaled Fitzgerald and Coelho and Murakami. But _Catcher in the Rye_ was the first book that Jinyoung had recommended to Jaebum.

Jinyoung was a purist. He maintained that Jaebum should start with a fresh copy, one that wasn’t marred by Jinyoung’s own thoughts and interpretations so that Jaebum could make his own. But Jaebum had insisted that if he was to be recommended the book his best friend loved, then he wanted to read it exactly the way his best friend did, with all the black ink and fluorescent yellow littering its pages.

So maybe Jinyoung had been more hopeful rather than factual when he placed this book in such a coveted spot in Jaebum’s bookcase, but he wasn’t wrong. Jaebum still wonders if he loves the book or Jinyoung’s thoughts about it more. Jinyoung wasn’t wrong either. His notes had affected Jaebum’s reading of it, but mostly in the way it made him appreciative of Jinyoung’s insight of Holden’s psyche and intrigued by his friend’s musings of where the ducks go for winter.

This is why he’s surprised when his copy of the book is slid his way across the coffee shop counter while he’s poised to take the next customer’s order.

Jaebum knows it could really only be one person who would have this, and he’s not surprised to look up from the counter and meet Jinyoung’s eyes and secretive smile.

“What’s this?” Jaebum says, already automatically writing Jinyoung’s drink choice on the cup in his hands.

Iced Americano, room for cream (though he never uses it, he just doesn’t like the precarious nature of a full cup, especially when it’s next to his assignments), and an extra shot of espresso.

He hands the cup off to Jackson, who’s manning the espresso machine today.

Jackson takes one look at the cup and gasps exaggeratedly, holding his face with both hands. “Jinyoungie decided to grace us with his presence!” he squeals.

Jinyoung waves royally to his subjects and takes a bow.

Jackson pretends to faint as Jaebum rolls his eyes.

“’Gyeommie’s on break, and thus not here to bask in your glory, but I’ve doubled my enthusiasm to make up for it.”

“I did notice a 10 percent increase in enthusiasm,” Jinyoung says in acknowledgement. “Nice work.” He turns his attention back to Jaebum. “Just something you’re going to need later,” he says.

Jaebum hands Jinyoung his drink with a pointed glance at their ‘college fund’ jar. “ _Real_ tips are appreciated, you know.”

“It’s a life tip,” Jinyoung maintains, leaning on the counter. “Plus, not all of us get by on our _tsundere_ and get $10 tips for $5 coffees, okay? Some of us work hard for their keep.”

“Not like Ms. Kwon isn’t leaving her entire life savings to you, her favorite librarian, with the smile that puts the sun to shame,” Jaebum says flatly.

Jinyoung doesn’t deny it and pulls out his wallet to pay for his drink, but Jaebum waves him off as he always does.

“Get out of here, kid. Bother someone else for a change.”

“Spoken like my favorite hyung,” Jinyoung says in an extra syrupy tone.

Jackson clears his throat obnoxiously as he’s refilling their pastry case.

“ _Second_ favorite hyung.”

Jackson beams behind the scones.

Jinyoung and Jaebum share a look. Jaebum bites his lip to keep from laughing and Jinyoung hides his grin behind his hand.

“Well, thanks for the coffee. See you tonight.”

Jinyoung’s already got his hand on the door when Jaebum calls out. “Did we have plans for tonight?”

“We do now,” Jinyoung says, eyes bright.

With that, he’s gone.

Jaebum has so many questions, but he’s used to not getting answers until Jinyoung decides he wants to give them.

Their friendship is pretty constant. They’ve known each other too long for there to be any surprises. And yet, even though Jaebum would say he knows Jinyoung the most out of anyone, he gets the distinct feeling he’s playing catch-up and Jinyoung intends to keep it that way.

Jackson wolf whistles. “Damn,” he says, propping an elbow on the coffee machine and resting his chin there. “I hate to see him leave, but I love to watch him go.”

Jaebum’s already moved on to cleaning the counter at this point and swats Jackson with the towel he’s using with a hard crack.

Jackson swears and rubs his butt. “This is why Mark’s really the favorite hyung,” Jackson whines.

Jaebum fakes forward, towel still in hand. Jackson pretends to cower and also aims the milk nozzle towards him.

“Catch this steam, bitch,” Jackson says. “This is what 150 degrees of ain’t messing around looks like.”

Jaebum groans. “Stop hanging out with Bambam. All these memes aren’t good for him.”

“No,” Jackson agrees. “They’re good for the soul.”

Jaebum drops his towel in defeat.

Jackson triumphantly fist pumps in the air as Yugyeom comes back from break. Yugyeom barely has time to tie his apron on before Jackson is regaling him about his defeat of Jaebum, otherwise known as the store-wide spoilsport (mostly because he didn’t let them see how many coffee beans they could shove in their noses or whatever), and recalling the wonderful facets of Jinyoung’s butt or something along those lines - Jaebum had already tuned them out and retreated to the back for his break, Jinyoung’s book in hand.

He spends his lunch break reading _Catcher_ once more, though he studies Jinyoung’s scrawl more than the printed words on the page.

Later, he’s too busy during the rest of shift corralling Jackson from spraying Yugyeom with the whipped cream canister to think about what Jinyoung has planned for them.

And so the evening plays out as intended, a surprise of Jinyoung’s invention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title: jj project, "tomorrow, today"
> 
> so i guess if yall dont already know, i have no real set plan for this lol coupled with the fact that this is my first fic for this group and i'm writing each chap and posting it before i can change my mind means i'm not proofing as much as i do usually so i'm sorry for any inconsistencies or mistakes!! please don't hesitate to give me suggestions or feedback, i really appreciate it!!
> 
> thank you so much for all the support so far though, it really inspires me and makes me want to get chaps up as fast as i can, so thanks to everyone who left a kudos or a comment or a view!!! until next time~


	3. but i pretend

Jaebum is exhausted.

It’s only five, orange and pink in all its’ glory, but he had put in some overtime at the shop, since the after-school crowd didn’t edge out until late in the afternoon. By the end of it, there were a few shaky college students hunched over their laptops and some quiet readers curled up with their books, which Jaebum thought Yugyeom and Jackson could handle, especially when they were pushing him out the door, saying he looked like he was going to collapse.

Jaebum is nearly halfway there. He sits in his car, blinking slowly, body too weary to do much but lean forward and rest his head on his steering wheel, closing his eyes. He could almost slip away here, if not for the thump he hears on his window.

A muffled and excited “ _Hyung!_ ” makes its’ way inside and Jaebum shifts blearily to see Youngjae waving at him. Taking in his older brother’s stance, Youngjae puts his forearm on the window and rests his head there too.

A staring contest ensues, but while Youngjae widens his eyes and steadily turns pinker the more he struggles to beat his brother, Jaebum is a constant, steadily holding Youngjae’s gaze. Youngjae finally gasps and shuts his eyes, rubbing them with his hands and whining about how much it stings.

Jaebum laughs and feels his weariness slip away. _Cute_.

He opens the window and Youngjae quickly bounds up and puts both arms on the car door, resting his chin there.

“You’re allowed to breathe during _staring_ contests, you know.”

“It’s too dark, I can’t hear!” Youngjae volleys back, giggling.

“You’re in a mood,” Jaebum says.

“So are you. Just a different one,” Youngjae muses.

“Did practice go well?”

Youngjae nods happily. “Yes! Professor Kim-sshi thinks I’m nearly ready. I just have to work on this note from the refrain and then also breathe more from my diaphragm and –“

Jaebum yawns exaggeratedly and Youngjae swats him on the arm with a laugh. “Pay attention to me! I haven’t seen you all week.”

“It’s only Tuesday, Jae.”

“It feels like forever when you’re gone all the time,” Youngjae says with a slight pout. “I know you’re working, but still…you’re leaving for real soon and I’m just going to miss you is all.”

Jaebum nearly has to turn away so Youngjae doesn’t see the outpour of love and affection that’s threatening to spill out of him. Instead, he makes a pained noise and runs his hand through his brother’s hair. “Just gotta make the going tough, huh, Jae.”

Youngjae hums in response, content with sitting still so that Jaebum would continue his ministrations.

Suddenly Youngjae beams at his brother and tugs on his arm. “Come on, mom’s making curry!”

This is enough to push Jaebum to use the last of his energy to collapse in his house instead of his car. He lets Youngjae drag him inside and the smells coming from the kitchen instantly make Jaebum feel better.

They all gather around the table, setting places and making quiet conversation as they eat their meal. After, Jaebum washes dishes while Youngjae dries. He knows that he’ll miss their synchronism the most, the way Youngjae holds his hand out for a plate the second Jaebum has finished rinsing it, the mental map he has of the town, knowing when and where everything is and how long it’ll take if he takes it slow or speeds, the way he has a standing order and designated booth that is forever his and Jinyoung’s downtown at that diner that doesn’t look like much, but has the best pancakes this side of anywhere.

He knows that Youngjae can wash his own dishes, that he can learn a new town and all its’ quirks, that the rest of the group will guard that booth with their lives until Jinyoung and Jaebum make it back for the holidays, but these are all things piling up in the back of his mind until he realizes how much sadness he’s shouldered, knowing that he’s going to be a brand-new start somewhere else and just another deserter here.

With this, Jaebum wraps his arms around Youngjae’s middle just as he’s on his tiptoes to put away the last bowl on the high shelf. The nice thing about his brother is that he doesn’t question, just doles out as much love as he deserves to receive.  It makes the process all the more comforting and easy to someone like Jaebum. He squeezes his brother playfully and the squeak Youngjae emits makes Jaebum’s heart ache at how much he’ll miss the chew toy he knows to be his brother’s surprise.

He goes upstairs to his room a little later and lays on his bed, sleepily gazing at nothing on his phone until he curls up and drifts off.

 

What feels like a few moments later, Jaebum is awoken by something metallic and hard landing somewhere on his back. He groans and is about to curse this unknown entity out for throwing their keys at him until he feels someone jump at his side on the bed and a familiar voice curls itself right next to his ear in a whisper.

“Sleep doesn’t make the ugly beautiful, Jaebummie. It keeps the beautiful more beautiful.” Jaebum can hear the careful pause for effect. “So why are you bothering, hyung?”

Jaebum grabs the pillow from underneath him and aims for Jinyoung’s head, but is only greeted by a laugh at his incoordination as Jinyoung slides off the bed and onto the floor.

Jaebum can hear Jinyoung shuffling things around, probably cleaning up the scattered papers and the backpack leftovers Jaebum’s yet to attribute any usefulness to, and thus exist in the nether space of his bedroom floor until otherwise deemed worthy of trash can.

Otherwise than an occasional quiet “ _tsk_ ” of disappointment at Jaebum’s mess, Jinyoung is mostly silent. Jaebum can’t go back to sleep, but he’s able to close his eyes and pretend until he hears a zipper being closed and he finally gets the will to squint in Jinyoung’s direction in the darkness.

“Why?” Jaebum asks simply, putting a pillow over his face.

Jinyoung doesn’t answer and instead pulls the pillow away, swinging a leg around Jaebum’s middle so that he’s straddling Jaebum on his damn bed, holding Jaebum’s arms down with his hands. Even through his haze of grogginess, he can still sense that Jinyoung is much too excited for whatever late night/early morning time it is and he’d be more aware of their potentially compromising position if he weren’t still waking up.

“I’m tired,” Jinyoung says simply. Jaebum has the briefest chance to be annoyed before Jinyoung lets himself fall back onto the bed and tucks himself into Jaebum’s left side, in between him and the wall.

Younger Jaebum would have retorted that Jinyoung had literally just got there and there needed to be retribution exacted for such a dick move, and there probably would have been some shoving and hot-headed flare, but present Jaebum is just glad that he can continue to sleep and Jinyoung isn’t trying anything too wild tonight, especially when Jaebum is mentally and physically unequipped to deal with Jinyoung and the way he’s so carefully calculated, yet executed with ease.

Jaebum has the presence of mind to breathe exasperatedly in a way he knows Jinyoung hears and is presently ignoring by the grin that graces his face. But here he is, throwing a blanket over them both and pretending that everything isn’t ending just as much as it’s beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so i know this is super short compared to the other chaps and it's been forever and a day, which is why i wanted to get this out as quickly as possible even if i'm not super satisfied with it :/ sorry guys, i'm just trying to juggle having a full-time job for the first time ever and i'm starting grad school this week but these are all excuses. i hope you guys still enjoy.....whatever this is lol
> 
> by the way, thank you so so much to everyone who's commented so far!! it really makes me smile when i see people enjoying the story even if i have no idea what i'm doing. let me know if there's anything you guys would like to see in this because i only have a vague-ish idea of what i wanna do so ideas are super appreciated! i wanna write something y'all wanna read, you know? anyway, until next time ~
> 
> chapter title: jj project's on&on


	4. interlude: i was trying to feel some kind of good-bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg yall i made it!!! lol this past week has been Wild like i've never been more exhausted in my life, but anyway, i'll keep this short and ramble more at the end, true to form lol
> 
> just wanted to note that this chapter is from jinyoung's perspective (because that's just what wanted to be written i guess lol) and it's a lot more angsty than the previous chapters. also a bit longer than usual as well! i was a bit hesitant to put this up because i'm not sure it really fits with the tone of the story so far, but i hope you guys enjoy it anyway!!
> 
> also this is dedicated to my new friend and soulmate, gotchick, for all the support and general loveliness. seriously, ever since we started talking, i've been so inspired and happy to write, in general but mostly in responding to your amazing comments!! ily :)

_a few days earlier._

Jinyoung holds up _Never Let Me Go_ in one hand and _Veronika Decides to Die_ in the other.

Mark looks up from his phone from where he’s laying on Jinyoung’s bed. “Didn’t Jaebum get you that?” he says.

Jinyoung tilts his head in confusion. “He got me both. Actually, this might be his. I don’t -” Jinyoung lowers his arms and looks at both books with his brow furrowed.

“Exactly,” Mark smiles. He goes back to his game without another word, but Jinyoung already knows what that means. He places both books in a box to be taken with him when he leaves for school.

Jinyoung goes through a few more things from his bookcase, giving Mark a chance to deliberate when Jinyoung waffles between leaving something and taking it with him. Mark was three years older and was about to finish up his last year at state, so Jinyoung considered him the authority on what was useful or useless or maybe a bit of both. Mark makes the logical decision for him to leave his heavy leather-bound classics collection (“Y _ou’re going to be basically living at the library anyhow_.”), but deems the fox stuffed animal Jaebum won for him at a carnival in a neighboring town as worthy of making the trek to college with him.

Jinyoung sighs. If he has to shoulder everything Jaebum’s ever given him, they were going to be there all day.

Eventually, they settle on a nice collection of just shy of everything Jinyoung owns and they start packing his life away.

“How did you do this?” Jinyoung wonders aloud as he’s sitting on yet another one of his suitcases in an attempt to close it.

Mark gets up and presses down on the suitcase and holds a hand out for the zipper as Jinyoung struggles with it. Jinyoung relinquishes his hold with a huff.

“One, I didn’t have so much stuff,” Mark teases, gaining an inch on both the suitcase and Jinyoung.

Jinyoung pouts. “Half of this stuff is Jaebum’s. He just left everything on purpose over the last couple of months so he wouldn’t have to pack it himself,” he says petulantly.

“Two,” Mark continues, as if Jinyoung hadn’t said a word. “The hardest part is deciding what to take with you and what to leave behind.”

Mark finally gets the last of the zipper and meets Jinyoung’s eyes. “Some things are both.”

Jinyoung has a distinct feeling they’re not just talking about packing anymore.

Mark was one of the only people that Jinyoung felt had an upper hand on him. Jinyoung was clever, but he hid behind his charm more than his words. That’s what worked.  Mark had the uncanny ability to say things so simple but so full, like he had it all figured out while everyone else was just getting started. 

Things were so easy with Mark. He would never push unless he really meant it.

“That seems counterproductive,” Jinyoung says flippantly, hopping off his suitcase. He crosses his room and opens his closet so Mark can’t see his face. “And you’re here to lessen the burden, not add to it.” He pushes his hangers around aimlessly as if looking for something, just to have something to do with his hands.

“They take one philosophy class and suddenly it’s nihilism this, Marxist that,” Jinyoung mutters, just shy of too loud to be taken as talking to himself. “‘ _Everything’s an illusion_.’ We get it, Camus.”

Jinyoung can feel Mark staring at the back of his head for one long moment before Jinyoung grabs a bunch of clothes and tosses them onto his bed.

“Riddle me this,” Jinyoung says, crossing his arms over his chest and defiantly meeting Mark’s eyes, just to show him who really has it all together out of the two of them. “What’s going to get me the shy library nerd with the six-pack that I deserve?”

Mark moves slowly, sitting on the edge of the bed once more and looking in between the clothes and Jinyoung with a sort of caution that would have been imperceptibly fused with Mark’s general disposition if someone wasn’t looking for it. But it wasn’t just anybody trying to get past Mark’s genuine concern. He was one of Mark’s best friends and that made it all the more terrifying for Jinyoung, to have someone out there that knows just where to throw the match so that it sets him ablaze.

“That’s not who you said last time,” Mark says.

“My taste changed,” Jinyoung says simply.

“Last time, he was wearing a leather jacket,” Mark starts.

Jinyoung sends him a warning look. “Stop,” he says. He feels warm and uncomfortable and too old for this, from someone who was _supposed_ to be his friend.

“He loved music, but so did his brother. So he chose something easier, something his parents liked, better than having two kids who were good at something with no prospects.” Mark says, playing with the strings on one of Jinyoung’s (Jaebum’s) hoodies.

Jinyoung’s mouth goes into a line and he knows he doesn’t have anything to say that will make a difference, but he wants to scream at the top of his lungs.

“Made you coffee whenever you wanted, tells you he just made an extra out of habit,” Mark says softly. “You mention a book you’ve been dying to read and it’s there on your desk the next day.”

“I never said any of that,” Jinyoung says. His fingernails curl into his palm, just a shade too hard. He’s tripped up over the way he’s stumbled on that last word, as if his mouth is betraying the rest of his body.

Mark lets the moment settle between them, but Jinyoung knows it isn’t over, knows he isn’t safe.

“You didn’t have to.”

The room feels too small and Jinyoung wants to _hurt_.

“Says the person who can’t even look at his crush without going completely mute, not that you say much to begin with,” Jinyoung says. In this moment, he hates Mark, but he hates himself more. “I don’t think you’re one to talk.”

Mark’s mouth goes slightly agape but then creases shut, like he expected it, like they’ve gotten to the point where they both know just what to say to salt each other’s wounds so they never really close.

“Okay,” Mark says simply.

“Okay?” Jinyoung says, just shy of incredulous.

Mark shrugs and picks at Jinyoung’s comforter. “There are worse things,” he reasons. “Worse things you could have come up with.”

Jinyoung blinks and he’s watered down. He wipes his eyes with the back of his hand and it comes back wet with tears. He lets them fall, lets them paint his face in ugly blotches as he chokes back a sob. Mark has the decency to look sorry, but not enough that he’ll get an apology, Jinyoung knows, because he meant every single thing.

 _As he should have,_ Jinyoung thinks.

Mark shoves the clothes off the bed and Jinyoung collapses into him, soft, heavy whimpers wracking his body. He finds his way into Mark’s lap, and soon one hand is running through his hair and the other is rubbing his back as he lets it out.

“How do you do that?” Jinyoung hiccups. Mark scratches just near his nape. 

“Just,” Jinyoung throws his hands up. “Accept it?  That it’s not going to happen, that it just isn’t going to work?”

“It might,” Mark says, light as air.

Jinyoung thinks that’s the biggest difference between them, that Mark can leave it alone, that he’s content with seeing what may come, what may not. But Jinyoung’s been there and he’s done that and he’s not sure he’s content with living with it any longer, this sort of weight that’s heavy on his heart and mind and soul.

“I don’t want this,” Jinyoung chokes out, buries his head further into Mark’s lap. “He can keep it. I don’t want it.”

Mark doubles over and latches onto Jinyoung, holding him in a half-hug that makes Jinyoung laugh with how silly Mark is. He can feel the imprint of Mark’s smile on his back.

Mark suddenly untangles himself from Jinyoung and lays next to him. Jinyoung hides behind his sleeve, knowing he looks a mess. Mark tugs at his sleeve until Jinyoung swats at him and their laughter fills the room.

They both roll over and look towards the ceiling, watching the fan circle endlessly.

“I think you might want to take this with you,” Mark says.

Jinyoung lets out a choked little laugh. “I think not.”

“It doesn’t have to be one or other, Jinyoungie.”

“Yeah, but I can’t shove this one in a box when I don’t want to deal with it.”

Mark bites his lip. “I just think there’s something waiting for you at the end of this road and I think you need to see it through.”

Jinyoung takes a moment, then tugs on Mark’s sleeve. “Duly noted.”

Mark answers by tugging on Jinyoung’s ear. The sweater he grabs and throws over Jinyoung swallows his answering protest.

As such, they move past it as friends with too much between them do, using the rest of the day to sort out the rest of Jinyoung’s mess, emotional and otherwise. Jinyoung feels something shift that afternoon, a semblance of resolution seeping through an otherwise ordinary revelation, that maybe he should take this for what it is and keep it with him, a softness that has shaped him for so long he’s unsure how to undo it.

He smiles to himself as he gets a marker, cap between his lips as he scrawls, “ _JJ’s mess_ ,” on his boxes, and he thinks of how much he’s never been afraid of change but of boredom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title: the catcher in the rye - j.d. salinger
> 
> the rest of the titles have been from verse 2 but i think if jinyoung's perspective becomes a regular thing (not sure if it will be, but please let me know if you guys like it!) i'll use catcher quotes as titles for his chaps!
> 
> anyway, i hope you guys don't hate jinyoung too much after this!! i tried very hard to make his reaction seem reasonable in the sort of way that you would react to someone crushing salt into an open wound, you know? i felt so bad using mark in such a way haha he's actually my favorite in got7 and i just missed the opportunity to upload this for his birthday, but happy bday to you regardless cutie!! :)
> 
> anyway, thank you so so much to everyone who commented on the last chapter. they were all super insightful and beautiful words to love and adore as i tend to do when you guys say anything in the comments, so i'm so thankful that you guys took the time to do so. i hope it won't be too long of a wait for the next chapter, so see you guys soon!!


	5. i'm dreaming again today

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a.k.a. yeah i thought i was dead too lol

Jaebum feels warm and comfortable as he opens his eyes. Sunlight’s filtering in through his partially-closed blinds, but he can’t tell if it’s just shy of too early to be properly awake or not. Jaebum rolls over and reaches for his phone on his night stand, which makes Jinyoung murmur sleepily as they shift. He can’t feel his other arm because it’s probably been under Jinyoung all night, and Jinyoung’s grip around his middle tightens ever so slightly as they reposition themselves.

Jaebum clumsily turns his phone on and sees that it’s just past sunrise. He’s an early-riser when need be, but he figures that this was probably due to him passing out straight after dinner and then falling straight into bed with Jinyoung again after he came over.

He shakily swipes his screen and opens his calendar to see that he doesn’t have to be in at the shop until the afternoon but his shift ends sometime around midnight. He internally groans at the thought of a night shift, especially since school’s ended and he doesn’t have any homework or reading to hastily complete in between breaks and neither does anyone else, so the shop is quite busy until they hit closing.

Jinyoung loosens his hold on Jaebum and brings his hands underneath his own head, curling into himself. The corner of Jaebum’s mouth lifts in fondness, in appreciation of old habits and the cure-all of sleep. He gets up as gently as he can so as to not disturb Jinyoung. He sheds the hoodie and shorts he slept in and picks another one of each from his closet, grabbing his headphones and pocketing his phone before closing the door softly.

Jaebum goes through his routine, then goes downstairs to grab his keys and slip on his sneakers before stepping into the morning chill. He walks to the crossroads before breaking into a run, not looking back.

 

Jaebum feels calmer, lighter by the time he jogs back, fumbling with keys before opening the front door to the smells and sounds of home, which encompasses Youngjae’s laughter and Jinyoung’s insinuating smirk in the kitchen, and his parents reading the newspaper and drinking their tea and eating some of his mom’s scones. He sees a streak of flour on his brother’s face as he toes off his shoes and as he turns around Jinyoung’s already telling Youngjae they “ _should really be paying more attention to the directions if they were to get anything done in time_.”

Youngjae playfully whines as Jaebum enters the kitchen, resting his chin on his brother’s shoulder as Youngjae pauses in mixing a bowl of pancake batter. “Hyung, now I’m incapacitated by my other hyung. This is just too much!”

Jinyoung looks up from chopping strawberries to _tsk_ at Youngjae. “You’re just easily distracted, Jae. This is how you get rid of a Jaebum properly.”

He takes a strawberry and dips it into Nutella, holding it out for Jaebum to eat. If it were anyone else, Jaebum would tell them to stop joking and he would hold the food himself. But since it’s Jinyoung and Jinyoung is nothing but insistent and Jaebum is nothing but indulgent of that, he pries himself off of Youngjae and opens his mouth. Jinyoung leans forward and holds the strawberry as Jaebum takes a bite.

He makes off pretty cleanly, he thinks, until Jinyoung turns back from tossing the strawberry stem in the trash and he’s hiding his smile behind his hand. Jinyoung swipes the corner of Jaebum’s mouth and his thumb comes back with some Nutella on it.

“You make such a mess,” Jinyoung says, licking his thumb clean. “What _are_ you good for?”

“Not much,” Jaebum admits with a grin.

The smile lines that ensue near Jinyoung’s eyes make Jaebum feel warm with familiarity.

Youngjae’s eyes dash between his hyungs and he thinks better of commenting on literally everything that just happened. He settles for a, “Gross, hyung, you’re gonna get sweat in the pancakes.”

Jinyoung grabs a kitchen towel and throws it at Jaebum, who catches it with ease. “Hit the showers, kid.”

“I’m gone,” Jaebum says, holding his hands up in surrender and leaving the kitchen. “I’m out.”

“Good riddance!” Jinyoung calls out. He turns towards Youngjae and says, “Now, we can actually get some stuff done, right, Jae?”

Youngjae’s excited agreement is the last thing Jaebum hears as he bounds upstairs with a smile.

 

Jaebum’s in an old shirt and some sweatpants when he comes back down, hair still damp and drying. Jinyoung’s on the couch with his phone in hand, scrolling aimlessly, with two full plates of pancakes in front of him on the coffee table. Jaebum spies three dirty plates in the sink. He falls into the couch next to Jinyoung and picks up a plate, warm from resting in the oven. Jinyoung was full of tricks like that, like he wasn’t aware that the things he did were endearing, but also giving the impression that he cultivated these habits just for that reason.

Jinyoung sets his phone down and picks his plate up as well. “Your parents took Youngjae out for a suit fitting for the recital,” he says by way of explanation.

Jaebum nods. He feels a little sad knowing that Youngjae is growing up just as fast as he was, but it seemed infinitely more compressed now that Jaebum was viewing it from the other side. He glances down at his pancakes, a trifecta of Nutella and strawberries. On top is a smiley face in whipped cream that he correctly attributes to his brother.

Jinyoung smiles. “I stopped him from full-out going Picasso on you, so be glad that’s more pancakes than whipped cream.”

“I wouldn’t have mind,” Jaebum says.

“I know,” Jinyoung says.

They both dig into their breakfast and Jaebum savors this, savors the lazy Saturday mornings where he can find his brother exasperatedly trying and Jinyoung effortlessly doing the same, and his mom hiding her laughter behind her hand and his dad’s grin just visible above his cup of tea.

The pancakes are delicious but Jaebum doesn’t know if he should attribute this to Jinyoung and Youngjae’s cooking prowess or the nostalgia seeping in. Between the two of them, they know exactly everything about him and maybe that should’ve been more bothersome to Jaebum, the fact that nothing about this situation was at all unfamiliar, nothing new to discover, nothing to take in. But instead, he wished it would never go away.

Jinyoung’s sawing through his stack of pancakes as Jaebum turns the TV on. They both have Saturday morning cartoons on their minds, but they barely recognize any of the new shows that have replaced their childhood favorites.

“This needs to stop,” Jinyoung says, pointing at the TV with his fork, a strawberry on the tip enunciating his every word. “Who is this and what have they done with Hey Arnold?”

“They kidnapped him along with Doug,” Jaebum theorizes as he finishes off the last of his whipped cream.

Jinyoung tsks. “The nation’s greatest travesty.”

“Our local human disaster would know,” Jaebum says, getting up and putting his hand out for Jinyoung’s plate as he goes towards the kitchen.

“Yeah, you would,” Jinyoung says distractedly as his phone vibrates a few times in succession. He’s quick to unlock it and type something back in response.

Jaebum starts on the dishes, but not without noticing how much Jinyoung’s been glued to his phone all morning. Jinyoung’s popular, but he usually waits until there’s a lull in the conversation or something when he’s with somebody before he checks his phone or messages people back. But Jaebum waves it off in his head as he rinses soap suds away. His phone’s been going off a little more than usual too, what with school ending and everyone giving their well wishes and asking what’s next for him now that graduation was only a few days away.

It’s not as terribly daunting of a question as he expected. The more Jaebum thinks about it, the more he knows everything’s been figured out and that whatever hasn’t worked itself out already will in time. He has his friends to remind him that everything ends and begins all at once sometimes, and it’s not terribly scary until it’s your time and now you wished you paid more attention to whether you’re supposed to have everything figured out already.

Jaebum thinks of the beat-up snapbacks and worn-out sneakers buried in his closet and the composition books he filled with lyrics that are mixed with the clothes in his dresser and he pauses, water running over his hands as he stares a bit into nothing.

He feels like he should feel something more about how soundlessly, wordlessly he stopped going under the big bridge in town, where all the b-boyers met and showed off something they made, something they learned from others, something they saw on YouTube and thought it might be fun to try out.

Maybe he should miss the notebooks he filled up every month without fail with the things he wanted to tell others, to make sure someone out there knew they weren’t alone, something that would help them forget their pain just for a while, just until it stopped hurting this side of too much.

Should he remember these things with some remorse, like when he dragged each homemade mp3 file on his computer to the recycling bin before he uninstalled all his mixes, programs, presets until he couldn’t remember the last time he stayed awake until three a.m., calling Jinyoung so he could hear that one change he made before the bridge and _was it too much, did it go with everything else, are you just saying that so I’ll hang up and let you sleep_?

Suddenly, the faucet’s squeaking shut and the water stops, taking Jaebum out of his thoughts. Jaebum sees a hand retreating and he turns his head. Jinyoung’s at his shoulder, wordlessly crossing his arms. No malice, maybe just a little bit of intent.

“Thanks,” Jaebum says, stacking the plates and dropping the cutlery into the drying rack.

He finishes and Jinyoung’s tugging on the back of his shirt and he’s not turning around, he doesn’t know why, he just doesn’t want Jinyoung to see him just yet, not until he figures it out, figures out what just happened and why he’s so, so empty all of a sudden.

“C’mon,” Jinyoung murmurs. Jaebum feels Jinyoung’s cheek graze the back of Jaebum’s neck, pulling back from whispering in his ear, and he has to suppress an unfamiliar shiver.

“What,” he murmurs, but Jinyoung doesn’t seem to notice. He’s already being pulled out of the house and into his car when he tries again. “Don’t worry about it.”

Jinyoung slides into the passenger seat and closes the door behind him. He holds the car keys up and spins them around his finger before catching them in his hand. Jaebum looks up. Jinyoung holds the keys out.

Jaebum reaches out but Jinyoung pulls back. He levels Jaebum with a look.

“Tell me you’re fine,” Jinyoung says.

“I’m fine,” Jaebum says equally.

The keys are still in Jinyoung’s hand.

“Try again.”

“Jinyoung, it’s nothing.”

“Try _harder_.”

Jaebum rolls his eyes.

Jinyoung offers the keys once again, but this time he lets them fall into Jaebum’s hand.

Jaebum turns the car on, pulling out of his driveway. The AC starts up and some cheery radio talk show filters through his speakers. Jinyoung fiddles with all the settings until they’re all muted, all at a level they can handle right now.

Jaebum doesn’t ask where because he knows there’s really only one place to go. Minutes later, they’re in front of their neighborhood park. It was in another neighborhood altogether, but it was much calmer than their own. They still called it theirs though. In their collective memory, they’ve built each other up and tore themselves down in equal measure sitting on this bench, those swings, that patch of grass.

By the time Jaebum gets out, Jinyoung’s already made his way to a bench. Jaebum climbs the hill and joins him.

Jinyoung has pulled his feet onto the bench and sits on his side, gazing in Jaebum’s direction as Jaebum mirrors his position on the other side of the bench. Jaebum feels the arm rest digging into his back and the dew that’s settled on the bench overnight.

This is how it goes, so that they can take a moment, take a few, take whatever they need.

Jinyoung bunches his sleeves into his hands and Jaebum slips his into his sweatshirt pocket. If he closes his eyes, he sees them daring each other to swing higher, hiding behind trees while the other swore they’d find them, chasing each other until one of them fell, laughing into the grass.

Maybe years, maybe moments later, they’re lazing in the shade of their favorite tree, homework spread out between them, or sprawled out soaking up the sun and eating their afterschool snacks, or walking down the path until Jinyoung stops, looking like his heart is in his throat, and tells him that he likes boys, he has for a while, and he doesn’t want it to be the thing that breaks them. Jaebum reaches for him and never lets go.

He’s not sure if it’s by (Jinyoung’s) design, but he has reservations about the bench. Mostly, he’s hesitant about sitting on it, letting it do its work and the clock to turn and Jinyoung to do what he does best. This is where Jinyoung best uncovers what’s in his heart and on his mind. The two usually agree, but never around Jinyoung. Jinyoung knows where to look to for the cracks and the grooves that just need a question, a poised pause, a knowledge of its owner that rivals all others’. It makes Jaebum shift in his seat, nearly nervously, like he knows what’s about to come, though all they do is lie in wait for each other to make the first move. Jinyoung has his eyes downcast and Jaebum breathes in deep.

“So,” Jinyoung’s eyes flicker to Jaebum’s.

Jaebum shrugs. He knows Jinyoung is looking for something specific, something Jaebum knows he won’t be able to give him. It was better to pretend, even if they both knew it was a lie.

Jinyoung shuffles closer to Jaebum and Jaebum just watches until Jinyoung takes ahold of Jaebum, somewhere near his nape, close enough to know that he needs a haircut by the way Jinyoung runs his fingers in Jaebum’s hair. He’s where he always is, in Jinyoung’s hands.

“You are capable of hurt,” Jinyoung says. It’s with an air of careful casualty and Jaebum’s not sure that he’s ever heard Jinyoung take that tone with him, like he’s about to deliver a blow, like he’s going to skip past what Jaebum _wants_ to hear and go straight into what he _needs_ to hear. “I think, more than anyone, towards yourself.” Jinyoung lets go and Jaebum catches himself before he leans forward, chasing Jinyoung’s touch.

Jaebum recovers and shrugs. “It happens.”

“Well, it shouldn’t.” Jinyoung says. He draws his legs to his chest. “Be kinder to yourself, asshole, so I can do my job of being horrible to you.”

“Horrible  _for_ me.” Jaebum corrects.

Jinyoung adopts Jaebum’s indifference and shrugs. “Same difference.”

The corner of Jaebum’s mouth lifts in a lopsided laugh and Jinyoung’s eyes are slowly crinkling.

Jinyoung sighs and stretches, his legs finding themselves in Jaebum’s lap. Jaebum hooks an arm around them and pulls Jinyoung more securely in place. His fingers trace senseless patterns into the frays of Jinyoung’s weathered jeans. Jinyoung closes his eyes and allows himself to sink into the moment. Jaebum does the same and they nearly doze off, safe in the comfort of being around someone who feels like you but different, like maybe you were supposed to find one another, meant to be something to each other, like the universe demanded it.

Jaebum’s pocket buzzes and he takes out his phone and swipes at his screen with his eyes closed, trying to remain in the moment, until he peeks through one eye to see that Jackson sent him a picture of the coffeeshop.

Whenever Jaebum isn’t there with him, Jackson knows that it puts Jaebum’s mind at ease to see that the place is still standing so sometimes he sends him pictures of the shop, usually with snarky captions about the complicated order he’s being put through (every time Jackson sees a list of more than three modifications on a drink, he looks towards the ceiling and asks some higher being if he's being tested) or posing with surprisingly well-formed foam milk moustaches with Yugyeom.

Jaebum’s eyes widen as he takes in the picture of the back of someone at the register and a girl blushing deeply as her order is being taken. “ _Come for the Bam, stay for the Wang!_ ” it says with a few winking faces.

He immediately straightens in his seat and Jinyoung groans as his legs are being pushed off. Realizing something is wrong, Jinyoung finally sits up and rests his chin on Jaebum’s shoulder to look at his screen, at which his eyes immediately widen as well. Jaebum doesn’t notice as he sends off a few chats to Jackson asking for an explanation.

“Don’t know what they’re playing at,” Jaebum mumbles. “Just because I’m not there…”

Jinyoung recovers quickly. “Yes, yes, you rule with an iron fist.” When he still feels how tense Jaebum’s shoulders are beneath him, he starts again. “They were probably just in a spot, and you know Bam’s always there anyway. He knows the menu by heart.”

Jaebum doesn’t take his eyes off his screen. “Yeah, just to tell Yugyeom to make some crazy shit and then convince him to drink it, and then I have to rub his stomach for hours while he complains about how evil his best friend is.”

“What can I say,” Jinyoung grins. “He learned from the best.”

“Unfortunately,” Jaebum says. He stares at his phone for a few seconds more before nudging Jinyoung off his shoulder and standing up. “Jackson always has his phone on him. He should’ve said something already. I’ll just head over and check on them.”

Jinyoung scoffs.  “I’m sure they’re fine.”

Jaebum makes a noise of disagreement as he heads down the hill towards his car. Jinyoung groans but runs to catch up. Jaebum’s already getting into the driver’s seat when Jinyoung reaches him. As Jaebum moves to close the door, a hand stops it.

Jinyoung pushes the door open. “Really, Jae, you’re overreacting. Bambam’s not even going to go anywhere near the machines, okay? That would require work and he’s allergic to that. He has Jackson and Yugyeom anyway.”

When Jaebum doesn’t look convinced, Jinyoung rolls his eyes. “You know he’s just going to pretend to flirt until the tip jar’s full, and then he’ll probably give up and go back to being only an ‘honorary’ employee afterwards.”

“’Honorary’ gets you leftover muffins, not behind the counter.” Jaebum moves to close the door once again, but Jinyoung remains.

“Okay, just – fuck, you’re strong,” Jinyoung huffs. “Just – god, he’s there to cover your shift, okay?”

“What?”

Jinyoung finally pries the door fully out of Jaebum’s grasp as his hand limply falls from the handle and he opens it wide. “You _could_ just trust me, but that’s not your M.O., so here’s everything, okay? You’re fired.”

“ _What?_ ”

“With pay for the next two weeks, because I’m very, _very_ good.” Jinyoung nearly looks accomplished, but he’s done better before.

Jaebum’s mouth falls open. Jinyoung takes ahold of his chin and closes it.

“So, there. Now you can stop and we can go finish whatever moment or nap thing we were in the middle of, maybe this time in the car because we have blankets.” With that, Jinyoung closes the car door and goes to the other side and settles into his seat. He rummages through the backseat and produces his backpack, that Jaebum didn’t even realize was back there, and produces a blanket from within. He looks in the back and sees that his bag is there too, along with food and what looks like camping gear.

“In two weeks, we’re moving,” Jaebum settles on saying.

“Graduated,” Jinyoung agrees. “Young, wild, and free – or at least that’s what they keep telling us.”

Jaebum pinches the bridge of his nose. “I was going to work there until then because of the fact that living is, in fact, _not_ free.”

Jinyoung shrugs, already curled up underneath his throw. “Now it’s like you did, and you don’t even have to show up. ‘ _Thank you, Jinyoung_.’”

Jaebum shakes his head. “Jinyoung, stop dicking around.”

“What? I’m not. You legitimately never have to show up again if you don’t want to –“

The ringing tone coming from Jaebum’s phone makes Jinyoung roll his eyes.

“But of course,” Jinyoung says.

Bambam picks up quickly and they hear him before they see him. “ _Hyung_ ,” Bambam singsongs. A pixelated version of himself comes up on screen before the connection works itself out. He’s all smiles as he leans against the register. “What’s up?” he says, drawing it out.

“You’re wearing your apron wrong,” Jaebum says.

“No, I’m wearing it all right, hyungie.” Bambam angles his phone lower so that his silk leopard button up is on full display, what little of it is buttoned. His apron’s loose so that his smooth chest shows over the uniform.

As Jaebum’s mouth further drops into a straight line, Bambam laughs. “Calm down! The customers like it. Some of the employees too. Right, Gyeommie?” Bambam winks at the Yugyeom who scoffs and pushes Bambam, but he’s suspiciously pink all the same.

“Are you wearing heels?”

“Um, excuse you, hyung, these are Saint Laurent slip-ons.”

Jaebum pinches the bridge of his nose. “You’re supposed to be wearing closed-toe shoes because we have –“

Bambam lets out a “ _whoops_ ” and a giggle as he stumbles.

“-mats.”

Jaebum is gritting his teeth so Jinyoung takes over and grabs the phone out of his hand. “How’s that tip jar looking, Bammie?”

“Take a look!” Bambam changes his camera and shows them the “college fund” jar, which has an added post-it to it today, “ _Compliments free of charge!_ ”  Bambam explains, “Oh, people have been really liking that, except they keep complimenting me when it's supposed to be the other way around, but _I'm_ not complaining.”

“Keep it up,” Jinyoung flashes Bambam an encouraging smile and a thumb’s-up.

“No, uh, _fuck that_. Go sit your ass in a chair until I get there and shove a whole –“

“Okay, thanks, Bam, have fun at work, _bye_!” Jinyoung hangs up before Jaebum can get another word in, which doesn’t stop Jaebum from glaring at Jinyoung while he hands his phone back over.

Jinyoung tries again. “It’s even resume-approved. Brian’s happy to be a reference once you find another coffee shop to slum it at in our new place.” Jinyoung puts on a more laidback low tone. “ _’Yeah, like, he never showed up, but like, when he did, he huffed the peppermint syrup and took a nap in the sugar packets. Six and a half out of ten, would not recommend.  But damn, that body’s like, a solid nine, you know? Keep him around for the eye candy._ ”

Jaebum leans against his headrest with a groan but also near acceptance. “Why?”

Jaebum turns so he’s looking at Jinyoung, who does something between a smile and a smirk. “Let’s take a drive."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so hi lol it's me, your local failure. today's my birthday actually, so that makes it literally two months since i last saw y'all ahhhhh
> 
> sorry again and again. i tried so much with this, even when i just wrote a sentence a day, that it ended up being twice as long as usual, so i hope that somewhat makes up for basically disappearing lol. i think this ended up mostly being filler and i like some parts more than others, but you know, it's my birthday, i wanted to finally get this up, and yeah i missed y'all, like i've been gone long enough that we got a new album. ummm how about that comeback though?? jb smiling as he mouths every lyric to teenager proudly is everything to me.
> 
> honestly not sure when i can promise an update, but even if it takes as long as this one did, i'll make sure to work on it just bit by bit so you guys can get it better late than never!! please let me know what you think and i love you all. thanks for being my encouragement and inspiration to keep going with this no matter how long it takes :')
> 
> chap title: icarus by jj project


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